Feet On the Ground

My second screenplay which is still making the rounds, a comedy about a sixtyish actress.

Feet On the Ground poster
An hour later. Alice and Jimmy are walking to Kate’s car.
JIMMY Alice, I swear I was going to tell you.
ALICE Tell me what?
JIMMY It just didn’t seem so important.
ALICE Is this about your book? Oh, don’t worry about it.
JIMMY I am worried. I’m worried you’re going to get the wrong impression. Look, I will admit to a little sensation-mongering to get the book out there. But my book, really, my book is a group portrait of all the formidable women in my life and not, as you might think, some sort of spermatic tabulation. It is a celebration of life, of love, of taking chances with your heart. I take it very seriously.
They stop in front of the car.
ALICE I don’t care. It’s not my business.
JIMMY I guess it’s not.
ALICE No, it’s not. You say you’re “colleagues” with Kate—
JIMMY Well we are.
ALICE And so are we. So please don’t put me in this position. Please don’t.
JIMMY What position?
ALICE The position where I have to say I don’t care about what you write or who you write about or why.
JIMMY Why shouldn’t you care? Because you think it’s a tell-all about cheap casual sex?
ALICE Well, is it?
JIMMY No, it’s about love.
ALICE With that title?
JIMMY It’s a rotten title, granted. I was trying to be intriguing, sell a few copies. Come on, you’re not a prude.
ALICE You’re missing the point. Women of my generation—
JIMMY Oh, women of your generation—
ALICE Women of my generation considered sex a private personal thing. Which probably means we’re out of sync with the rest of the world—
JIMMY It means you’re a beautiful woman with a beautiful soul. I know I don’t think like the usual guy. I think a man should fall in love with every woman before he goes to bed with her. Take her whole being into account. That’s the theme of my book. It’s been the joy of my life.
ALICE There are rehab centers for that kind of joy, sonny.
JIMMY Look, I will admit it. I will admit that the variety of my relationships has pretty much consumed my time and I’m the first to say it, I’m not getting any younger. And don’t you say what you’re about to say.
JIMMY That I’m young enough to be your son.
ALICE Well you are!
JIMMY An empty cliché. That means nothing and you know it. Because deep in your heart you know you’re just trying to find any excuse not to deal with what’s happening between us.
ALICE I refuse to continue this conversation.
JIMMY I suppose you’re going to want to take the bus home now.
Alice looks up and down the dark street.
ALICE No, give me a ride.
They open their doors.
ALICE I may be crazy but I’m no fool.


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