From The Patrick and Maureen Maybe Music Experience, Written and Performed by Patrick Barlow, with Imelda Staunton

On BBC radio streaming until the middle of October, 2019. From 1999, so I guess that makes this show 20 years old.

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Patrick: This is Irina, the performance artist from Praha.
Maureen: Where?
Irina: Praaa-ha.
Maureen: Yes, I think we know where she comes from. Does she normally wear that?
Irina: I wear very little. There is a saying in my country, “Music is like the body. The more it is exposed, the more it can arouse.” Another expression we have in Czech, “Music is like sex—if we do not have it, WE DIE!!!”
Maureen: (alarmed) Sex. She said sex!
Irina: My music is like my sex. It come from the dark inside of my wooomb of my sex! Yearning to receive the seed of the dark black innards of my inward being… Dark, black, and hot, they copulate in the tone of the music of the fire that meets and heats, and in the heat is born the sacred coming of the sex of my body, is sex and my body is music, on and in, and in and on, my body is the sex of my heat, and my music, my heat, my body is on…
Maureen: Heat?
Irina: Of course. Always. Or as we say in my country, “[something-something-sex in Czech]”… Now I tune and prepare. (plays violin, orgasming loudly to music)
Maureen: Well, that was quite unusual.
Irina: (panting) Thank you.
Patrick: Um, did you actually achieve…?
Irina: (more panting) Orgasm? Of course.
Maureen: So, any other questions you’d like to ask, Patrick…? Any tips? Sorry, the producer’s flashing me. (in headset) Yup! Sorry? Yes yes, I know, well, he’s had her on, it wasn’t my idea…
Patrick: I did not get her on! I was under the impression we agreed we needed an example of the solo fiddle…
Maureen: Yes yes, you would like a fiddle wouldn’t you? (in headset) Yes, yes, all right. (hangs up headset) I’m afraid this is the BBC and we can’t have people having orgasms on it. Can we, Patrick?
Patrick: (deflated) No, no, I’m afraid not.
Maureen: (to Irina) So please leave. Now our next guest…

The battling couple then goes on to humiliate Juliet Stevenson.


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A Rodgers & Hammerstein Moment 3: Jack Benny Plays “Getting to Know You” with Giselle MacKenzie

jack-benny-giselle-mackenzie.jpegReally you mooks, in case you miss it below, HERE’s the clip on YT.

The audience didn’t even need the words to get the humor in this bit, so well-known is this song from The King and I (Broadway 1951, film 1956). From somewhere in the mid-50s on Jack’s TV show.


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A Rodgers & Hammerstein Moment 2: John Lithgow Sings “Oklahoma!” to Jane Curtin, with a Little Help from John Raitt

…and the entire cast of down-home diner customers, who all know the words. From season 1, episode 12 of 3rd Rock from the Sun, first aired in 1996.

3rd rock sings oklahomaYou mooks again, in case you missed it above, HERE’s the clip on YT.


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A Rodgers & Hammerstein Moment 1: The Gang at Cheers Sings “You’ll Never Walk Alone” to Their Despondent Pregnant Barmaid

Season 1, episode 15, 1982. Said Donna Bowman of the AV Club: “You’ll Never Walk Alone” [in the episode] took me totally aback. I can’t think of very many sitcom moments that hit that exact tone. I kept waiting for the punchline, and there’s no doubt that we’re intended to smile at the parade of patrons mumbling along under Diane’s leadership, but Carla’s reception of the gesture transforms it into the sincere expression of support that was intended. When we see her continue up the stairs, the camera following her through the window, it’s a moment that reassures the audience in a very specific way. We know Carla’s children’s welfare is actually really important, the moment says. Carla’s, too. These people are trying to do a good thing. We’re going to let them do it. You can imagine a million jokes that would undercut that message for the sake of a laugh. But they don’t come. It’s like a Good Housekeeping seal of approval for our emotions: “Invest with confidence.”

cheers sings you'll never walk aloneYou mooks, in case you missed it above, HERE’s the clip on YT.


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The Police Perform Ghost In the Machine at the International Stadium, Gateshead, 31 July 1982

If I hadn’t fallen so hard for Geordie-born-and-bred John Wilson, Conductor I’d never have been delving into All Things Gateshead and I never would have stumbled onto a bootleg recording of this show by English progressive rock group The Police, which was the very show Mister Grumble and I missed in New York when we were just setting up household in the East Village and I was heavily pregnant. Great music, great energy, and the sound is impeccable.

The Police, Gateshead, England, 31 July 1982Touching to catch a (private?) glance at Sting—another Geordie, by the way—crossing himself before taking the stage. Above Sting: The entire audio of the concert.


For more on The Police’s drummer, go to my posting below, “The Equalizer Theme by Stewart Copeland“.


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Lea Salonga Sings “In One Indescribable Instant” from Crazy Ex-Girlfriend by Rachel Bloom, Jack Dolgen and Adam Schlesinger

Why yes, I am a Crazy Ex-Girlfriend fan, and thank you for asking.

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Season 1, episode 18, 2016. Lea Salonga, as heroine Rebecca Bunch’s object of romantic desire Josh Chan’s singing-star aunt, sings a lovely but so over the top Disney Princess Song. This is before all hell breaks loose in seasons 2 and 3.


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A Mike Nichols and Elaine May Routine: “Teenagers in a Car” Circa 1959

Susie Myerson to Mrs Maisel in Season 1, Episode 6 of The Marvelous Mrs Maisel:

Susie: Miriam, he just sold you some line ’cause he wants to get in your pants.
Midge: He does not want to get into my pants.
Susie: He wants to fuck you!
Midge: He wants me to work with him. He says we’ll be like Nichols and May… Nichols and May don’t fuck.
Susie: Nichols and May totally fuck!
Midge: That’s not what he says.
Susie: I walked in on them once in the bathroom here. Even their fucking was hilarious!


EXTRA: Find the NICHOLS AND MAY playlist on my YT channel here


Extra Extra! And read Vanity Fair’s 2012 exclusive interview “The Reunion of Nichols and May” here


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